Why do girls like bad boys? I’m sure we all wonder this. Why do girls gravitate to men who appear to be assholes and treat them poorly? Do women really want bad boys, or is it a misconception? 

Actors like James Dean and Marlon Brando became famous from their bad boy image, and are still lusted after by women even now. Movies always portray the bad boy trope as a romantic interest for their female casts. Is it true then? If so, why do girls like bad boys?

Bad boys are exciting

The most obvious appeal about bad boys I believe, is how exciting they are. For women, bad boys can be considered a challenge. They’re unpredictable, which makes them exciting. You can feel like you’re getting swept up in something. Bad boys can give you a feeling your normal life doesn’t.

There’s no commitment

This is something I don’t think a lot of men realise. Not all women are looking for commitment. Especially those in their early twenties. Some men, you know they’re not looking for anything long term. You can expect something fun, exciting, but also strings free. Too many people have it in their heads all women want to settle down, get married and have children. Maybe they do, but that doesn’t mean right now. Sometimes, right now, they just want to the thrill and adventure.

Women want to feel needed

There is this romantic idea that a perhaps you can change the bad boy into the perfect boy. That’s another aspect of the challenge. They think they can “fix” them. Obviously the chances are very low, and the woman probably knows that. A lot of women that gravitate towards bad boys, and want to fix them, probably have problems of their own. They don’t want to face those problems directly, but they do feel the need to change. So t

A lot of women have low self-esteem

This links to the fixing thing. It also goes deeper than that. When you have low self-esteem, you start thinking that maybe you deserve the bad treatment. When a bad boy becomes abusive, or neglectful, a part of you thinks you deserve it, and there’s a sense of horrible satisfaction from accepting that.

Of course, being with a bad boy could just be a way to improve your own image. Perhaps they want to project the image of a bad girl. They want to appear more confident and independent and so they are attracted to guys who have those traits.

Bad boys are confident

Some would say arrogant and cocky. The fact is, confidence is a huge turn on for most women.  A lot of men who are confident also have charisma. It shows in the way they talk to people and in the way they act. You can even see the confidence simply from their body image. It oozes from them, and the women come to that like bees to honey. You’ll notice that they tend to be smooth talkers, and that goes a long way as well.

Bad boys are good looking

Of course genetics play a part in this. However, looking good comes from more than just genetics. These guys have a look they’ve groomed themselves into. They have a clothing style the stick to. They know what works for them. What makes them look good. It makes a big difference to be actively caring about your appearance.

There’s a sense of mystery

We’re all attracted to someone who’s mysterious. It makes us curious. We want to find out things about them. Every new, little thing you find out makes you feel closer. It makes you feel more special to them. These guys give so little away, it’s again that sense of achievement that women want to work towards. They also don’t “fit in” like normal people. There’s a sense of uniqueness to them, even if they’re actually very cliched.

They are masculine

We’re talking Alpha male with a capital A. These are guys that know what they want, when they want it. They wear their masculinity like a cologne. Women are attracted to that from a primal level. Things also feel much more clear cut. It doesn’t feel like something you can fake. There’s also a sense that they have no fear. Women want to feel protected, and a strong masculine guy can give them that.

Is it hopeless for everyone else?

Whilst these are all reasons as to why girls like bad boys, it’ doesn’t mean things are hopeless for everyone else. Yes, some women want a non-committal relationship with a man who’s ridiculously alpha. But it’s often a phase, and once they get it out their systems, bad boys aren’t the ones they’re looking to spend the rest of their lives with.

You can also have a lot of the attractive qualities without being a bad boy. You can be confident, dress well and take care with your personal looks. Leather jackets and cigarettes aren’t the key to a woman’s heart.

It might feel that women are pushing you aside to go after guys that treat them badly, but comparing yourself to these men isn’t going to help you. If you’re not a bad-boy, so what? There are plenty of ways to be exciting and charismatic without styling your hair like James Dean.