Hiring an escort isn’t something we openly talk about. No one says “Oh hey, how was your weekend? Yeah, I hired an escort, it was fantastic.” But that’s not to say people don’t do it. In fact, it’s a lot more common than you might expect. But what does hiring escorts say about you?
There are many reasons why a guy might hire the services of an escort. For a long time, such actions may label a man as a sexual deviant or general pervert. Whilst there may still be some very conservative people that still look down on the practice, studies show it’s not the evil crime it used to be painted as.
Researcher Sabine Grenz of the University of Gothenburg in Sweden explains “There are no social characteristics that basically distinguish johns from other men.”
Why men hire escorts
Firstly, let’s look at reasons why men may hire escorts. Escort services have a lot more variety than they did before. Hiring an escort no longer means you’re simply paying for sex. There are also different laws in different states and countries around the world that also changes the type of exchange you may have with an escort.
Some men are looking to book an escort for sex. They may have various reasons for this. The most common one is that they are not being sexually satisfied in their personal life. This could be due to time constraints if they are in demanding jobs and have little time to jump into the dating scene.
There are men who simply want the ease of sex without any strings. Married men may also use the sexual services of an escort if they are not able to fulfill their needs within their marriage.
There are also a large number of men who are looking to try out fantasies or to explore and learn about sexuality. You can hire an escort and try new things you’re interested in without fear of judgment. In some cases, you may even find an escort who is an expert in whatever sex act you’re interested in and they will be able to educate you properly on it. Examples could be those interested in BDSM.
Finally, there are also many men who are looking for a connection. This concept might seem weird to some people, but it’s actually very common. If you have never considered the services of an escort, you may believe it’s just in and out for sex. However, escorts can offer a lot more than just sex.
Many men who visit escorts want companionship and emotional intimacy. Escorts are professionals and many are great listeners who understand their clients. It’s a great opportunity for some to relieve their stress, both mentally and physically.
You can be very close and intimate with someone for a short period of time, without the worry and stress of an ongoing relationship. Some psychologists have pointed out similarities men may feel visiting an escort as they might visiting a therapist.
Type of men who visit escorts
Contrary to popular belief, there are no weird personality problems with men who visit escorts. A survey in 1994 psychologist Dieter Kleiber of the Free University of Berlin stated that out of the 600 men who took part, there were no particular abnormalities with men who visited escorts. There was a higher chance that men who did not use protection were older and married though.
In larger surveys, it’s shown that men of most diversities, whether race, age or occupation have admitted to using the services of an escort. There are no big trends for who might look for services with an escort.
There are trends, however, in the type of men who visit escorts more regularly. This group often consider themselves “hobbyists” and are likely to be in online communities that are more open with their hobby.
They do things such as review various escorts. This group of men are more likely to consist of men who are white, married, have graduate degrees, and earn over $120,000 per year.
These type of men will look for escorts online and through agencies. Men who make lower income are more likely to meet an escort on the street or in the red-light districts.
What it says about you
Society as a whole is more accepting and understanding of men who use escort services. Whilst there may still be some groups who have negative views, the overall climate has changed more positively.
Media outlets such as magazines are more open with writing about sexuality, more scientific research is going into understanding the psychology and effects, and sex education overall has improved.
We now understand that there are many reasons why a man may use the services of an escort. There’s little to no correlation between visiting escorts and sexual violence. Men who use escorts come from a large diversity of race, class, and career.
It may not be something you want to tell people about in normal conversation, as it’s a personal and intimate topic. But it’s definitely not something you should feel ashamed or judged for by society.
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