Hi Harriet, I need your help. I’m intimidated by my girlfriends new vibrator. My girlfriend recently got a new vibrator, it’s one of those rabbit ones with that vibrate and also rotate a bit. I knew she’s used sex toys before, and the idea actually turns me on a lot, but this time when I saw the size of her new vibrator it made me feel very intimidated. I didn’t realise vibrators and dildos were so huge. I’m worried that my penis won’t measure up afterwards and she’ll be disappointed.
Sex toys can certainly be very off putting. There is such a wide variety out there; from mini clitoral vibrators to 15” double ended dildos. It can leave everyone feeling a bit confused and overwhelmed.
In fact, when I bought my first sex toy, I felt intimidated by it myself. The fact they now do all sorts of things such as rotating (or even providing electric shocks!) only makes them seem more and more so. I completely understand why you may have feelings of inadequacy when comparing yourself to an endless possibilities, gyrations and stamina.
However, after two years of experimenting and trying out lots of sex toys; nothing compares to a real penis!
It’s not just dildos that don’t compare but also vibrators, butt plugs and the infamous Hitachi Magic Wand (TM!). A girlfriend asked “would you rather have all the sex-toys in the world and never have a penis again or just one penis for the rest of your life?”
It’s easy. Give me the real thing. No question.
There are two reasons why your penis will always be better than a sex-toy.
Feel.
Technology just isn’t good enough to mimic the velvety soft touch of skin, nor it’s temperature. Skin on skin. Warmth. Emotionally and physically add up to more than the sum of their parts.
Sex toys are also less flexible than a real penis. So the fit and motion just doesn’t feel quite as good as what your body can naturally offer. In sci-fi/hippy terms; it’s not organic.
Sure, your girlfriend’s new vibrator can rotate, but it can only rotate a certain way, even if it’s a perfect fit for her, it cannot respond to her body, her mood or learn what she likes.
The penis on the other hand is perfectly suited to adapt to the bumps and curves of her vaginal wall and your penis is controlled by your brain which feels her, responds to her, learns from her and even loves her.
I can say hands down, my even favourite part of sex is the moment a guy starts to put his cock inside me. The feeling of the tip just pushing in, like a hot velvet rod. I pretty much orgasm from that alone. I could never imagine a toy being able to recreate that feeling.And it certainly can’t recreate those special moments only a living feeling person can create.
A good solution to your insecurities would be to maybe look at buying some sex toys together, and trying some sex toys dedicated to men. It can be an extremely fun and beneficial experience to experiment with toys, and it also spices up your sex life. And if that doesn’t work just remember you’re the boss. Get the sex-toy on your team; make it work for you! Treat the toy as another string in your bow. Use it to add to your sexual prowess. Be the master of your girlfriends sex-toys. There really is no need to be intimidated by a piece of plastic.
I’m sure an open mind and a new sense of superiority over your inanimate competition lead you to an even more fulfilling sex-life and a better understanding of your girlfriend’s body and needs.