Gold diggers are women who have relationship with men with the goal of getting gifts or wealth. Can it actually feel good to date a gold digger, or is it just a horrible trap?
When it comes to the topic of gold diggers, I find most people are quite hostile about it. Many people believe that gold diggers are shallow, materialistic and someone even referred to them as the scum of the earth.
@HSugarCookie greed, shops on their partners wealth, if there was a choice of love or money they go with money. ect.
— Bruce Davis (@reginaldwarwick) October 10, 2016
I believe that a lot of these perspectives are reasonable, and you could agree to a few of them. However despite gold diggers having horrible reputations, people still date them. Is there a good reason for this? What is it about dating a gold digger that could make someone want to continue the relationship?
Why you would date gold diggers
Firstly, there’s a mutual understanding that gold digger are beautiful. To catch a rich man, they need to look like a 10 out of 10. No one would pay to be with a girl that was a 5 out of 10 after all. Beautiful women are desirable, so it stands to reason that there are men out there who desire them, no matter what the cost.
A lot of gold diggers can be quite intelligent. Combine these two attributes, intelligence and beauty, and you can understand why someone would want to date the girl. Men with cash at their disposal can judge for themselves whether spending money for the company of a beautiful and intelligent woman to be worth it or not.
An interesting way to look at it would be fine dining. Paying $100 for a brilliant steak vs paying $10 for a terrible steak. Most people would say a reasonable steak was somewhere between $20-$50, but there are people who are willing and happy to pay for a steak that cost hundreds.
@HSugarCookie even if I had the money, I couldn't do it no matter how pretty she is. Without emotional connection, there's nothing for me
— 22/223 80 gr. sniper (@naia910) October 10, 2016
The connection in a relationship with a gold digger
Gold diggers will give attention to the man that provides her with the lifestyle she desires. For many of us, the idea of paying someone to keep them interested in us sounds ridiculous. It wouldn’t feel as if there was a real emotional connection.
However you would get their attention. If kept happy, you would have a woman that constantly showered you with attention and affection. How real the affection is can be debatable, but you would get that attention.
Reddit user /u/MisterBroken confessed that he dated a gold digger.
“I know many will probably think I’m pathetic. But I’m happy to be with a girl that would otherwise be out of my league. Most of all, I’m happy to find someone that I can be generous with, as normally I am a very selfish person (as stated earlier).”
Are you being used?
In a sense, yes, you can argue that people who are dating gold diggers are being used. In cases where gold diggers enter relationships with men over twice their age, are unattractive but insanely wealthy it’s hard to argue that they’re not.
However if both parties are understanding of the fact one person offers wealth, and the other person offers their company, can it be considered being used? Both parties are using each other in that case.
Of course not all relationships are happy ones. A lot of people can be tricked and manipulated by gold diggers. However I believe there are an equal amount of relationships where both parties understand each other. I also believe it’s possible that the two parties can form a real connection.
Can it be a good thing?
Leonard Kim writes about being in love with a gold digger. He knew she wanted a rich man, and so he worked on being wealthy enough that she would be with him.
“I was in love with her, in love with her with all my heart. She told me of how she thought of me, being blunt and honest, due to my financial situation. She criticized and condemned me, for being the poor broke kid I was. It was really her who motivated me to stop being this lazy kid who played on the internet all day and motivated me to get a job.
So I had a goal in mind. To be the rich man she dreamed of, so I started working.”
In this case it brings up a really interesting point. If someone wants to improve themselves and gain wealth for a woman, is it a good thing? She made it clear from the start she wanted a rich man. He worked to become a rich man. Is he a better person for working hard to achieve this?
Conclusion
Whether dating a gold digger is positive or negative depends entirely on whether or not the two parties are in understanding of their relationship. If the man knows the woman is drawn to him for materialistic reasons, and if the woman knows he is attracted to her for her looks, then I think the relationship is fine. There are plenty of happy couples whose relationships fall into this category.
There are a lot of cases where this isn’t the case however. Some women can take advantage of lonely men. Some men are left when the money runs out, or they can no longer provide the lifestyle the woman wants. In these cases, then the results are negative. It really comes down to communication and understanding between two consenting adults on the nature of their relationship.