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The mysterious allure of a Mrs Robinson can be magnetic. She’s charming, she’s captivating and she’s seductive. But what is it really like to date an older woman? It’s not the same as dating girls your own age, that’s for sure. If you go into it blind and clueless, you can easily make rookie mistakes and lose your chance with her. So, here we’ve outlined for you some things to expect and to avoid when dating an older woman.

The bigger the age gap between you and your woman, the more differences you will see between the two of you. If she’s only a few years older, then you’ll still have a lot in common. It might even turn into a longer relationship. If she’s a decade or more older than you, then it’s less likely that the two of you will be able to form a partnership.

Mistake #1: Lying about your age

So you added a few years to your age in order to get a date with an older woman? Oh boy, not a good idea. Once she knows even the most basic information about your life, she will very easily be able to put two and two together to figure out your real age, and then she will kick your lying ass out the door. Trust is an important issue for older women, and you can’t build trust by lying.

Knowing what she wants

Have you ever been frustrated that girls your own age seem to talk in riddles? That you ask them a question and get a roundabout response? Or that they tell their friends what they want but don’t tell you?

The good news is that your older woman will tell you pretty much directly what she wants, so you don’t need to guess or be a mind-reader. She also expects the same from you, so you need to be ready to talk with her openly about your wishes and intentions. At first, it might seem to you like she’s being demanding, but you will learn to appreciate the transparency.

Independence – liberating or intimidating?

As women get older, they build up their own networks of friends and connections. By the time you enter the picture, she already has everything set up for herself. In other words, she doesn’t need you to be her everything man.

How do you react to that? Do you find it a relief that she doesn’t cling to you or rely on you for every little thing in her life? Or do you find it intimidating that she can take care of herself and doesn’t really need you?

The more you can view her independence as a positive instead of a negative, the more likely you are to be successful with her.

Another aspect of her independence is money. She can pay her own way and doesn’t expect you to treat her to fancy dinners and expensive jewellery.

Beware, though: just because she can pay for herself doesn’t mean that she will be your sugar-mama. She will drop you if she even suspects that you’re using her for money.

Connected to the idea of money, she will equally not be impressed by your status symbols or purchasing power. If she wanted power and status in a man, she would be looking for an older man, not a younger one!

So don’t worry about trying to impress her with your job or your watch or your car. She cares more about the type of person you are and how cute your butt looks in those non-designer jeans you’re wearing.

Your priorities vs her priorities

You probably don’t have the same life priorities as your woman, and that’s fine, as long as you both accept it. If she has kids, you need to realise that they come before you. She also has other big responsibilities in her life, such as her job.

What this means for you is that you can’t expect to be her number one all the time. She can’t always drop everything to hang out with you, and she might have to say no to you more often than you would like.

Don’t expect to be introduced to her friends and family either, especially if the age gap between you is substantial. The older she is, the longer it will take for you to be welcomed into her inner circle, if you ever are. You should be prepared for a private relationship, not a public one.

What about the sex?

It’s been widely reported that women’s sexual desire and sexual satisfaction peak at around age forty. Of course every individual is unique, but overall, older women are less self-conscious and more confident in the bedroom, and they are more open and comfortable with their sexuality and showing their desire. This is good news for you!

It’s likely that one of the reasons you’re attracted to your older lady is that she’s experienced sexually. The upside to her previous sexual experience is that she’s learned what to do and how to do it, mechanically speaking. But everyone is different, and you still need to share with her what you like.

Older women expect equal satisfaction in the bedroom, so it’s not just about your orgasm anymore. If you don’t pay attention to her needs and pleasure, she’ll get rid of you for someone who can please her. You need to learn what drives her wild.

Remember that it’s not all about penetration. Maybe a younger girl will be amazed simply by the sight of your winkle, but your older woman will not be impressed by the fact that you have an erection. Spend more time on things other than penetration, ask her what she wants and give it to her. In return, she will reward you using all of her years of experience and skills, and everyone will go home happy.

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