Where is the limit? What counts as cheating and what doesn’t? Is it okay to flirt, is kissing cheating? These are all question we ask ourselves when in relationship, especially in their early stages.

At the beginning of a relationship we feel passion. We want to be with our significant other at all times and we don’t even think about wandering under other horizons. After some time, love replaces passion and sexual relationship become more and more scarce. Libido decreases. This can lead to frustrations and cheating becomes an option to overcome that.

What is unfaithful?

According to the definition of the Cambridge dictionary, unfaithful means:

“Having a sexual relationship or experience with a person who is not your husband, wife, or usual sexual partner”

The limit seems to be very clearly set then, a sexual relationship. But is it really how we consider  unfaithfulness in everyday life? Plus, what exactly is a “sexual relationship”? When does that one start? Is a blowjob already “sexual relationship”?

We can ask the same question about non-sexual deeds such as flirting, thinking of someone else, thinking of someone else during sex.

Every individual has a different perception of what it means to be faithful. It is necessary to have a proper discussion on this topic with the partner. This would prevent serious misunderstandings

It is also a cultural thing. While French greet each other with kisses on the cheek, neighbor people such as Germans consider this already very intimate.

What about online cheating?

Our relatively new virtual reality seems to appear as a parallel one. One in which the rules we live by in the real world don’t seem to apply.

However, whenever we get a text, a selfie or something from someone who’s not our partner, we feel guilty. Why tough? “Nothing real happened”, that’s what you tell yourself. On the other hand, if you put yourself in your partner’s shoes, would you appreciate to find out ambiguous texts and pictures on their phone?


As usual, the main idea here is to remain honest both to yourself and your partner. Playful flirting can make you feel better about yourself, thus giving you a boost of confidence that can be healthy to your relationship. Just be sure to know where the line is before you know if you are crossing it or not.