Character traits exist in each and every one of us, but, for some reason, it seems as if other people always present themselves as either being happier or sadder than us. Why is that? Well, obviously, it has a lot to do with different factors like upbringing, routine, mental strength, self-awareness, etc.
For those guys out there who think they can’t be happy because of some bad luck or obstacles that are out of their control, it’s time to change the way you think. We’re not saying it’s time to make drastic changes and become someone you’re not, but changes in your life only happen one way: once you take control and make them.
For example, I’ve got a buddy who feels down and out right now. It’s been a summer full of ups and downs for him, as he and a girl he was dating for three months called it off in early-June. Then, he had some personal issues come up. Next it was feeling unfulfilled in his career. Now, three months later, he’s still bringing up the same issues, wondering when his luck will change. As we mentioned above, nothing will change until he shifts his thought process.
Since we know many guys can relate to this method of thinking, the whole “whoa is me” thing, if you will, we figured it’d be helpful to give some character traits that are found in the happiest men. Take these, understand these and then apply these to block out doubt and negativity and become a happier man.
Being grateful for what you have is easy to say out loud, but it can be so much more difficult to actually practice. Sure, we all tend to say the whole, “I know, things could be so much worse,” but, truly, do you believe that? If you don’t sit back and reflect on the positive things you have going on in your life, there’s no chance in hell you’re going to be able to maintain happiness over a long period of time. Those who practice what they preach train their minds into focusing on the important things and blocking out the distractions that can lead to negative thoughts.
Just because a guy is socializing doesn’t mean he’s the star of the show who walks into a room and talks to everyone. Sure, that’s a great trait to have, but socializing means being engaged with others, not having to know everyone. For example, rather than sit around and play on your phone while waiting at the bar for a buddy or a date, talk with the bartender or the person on the stool next to you. That type of socializing will put your mind in a positive place, which will naturally make you happy.
It’s hard to do, but being mindful of both yourself and others is a character trait that is necessary to develop in order to find happiness. Thinking about the past too much or putting too much pressure on yourself (or others) can lead to added stress that doesn’t need to be present. Instead, take a deep breath and recalibrate your mind. This can be done through working out, relaxing with some music and/or meditation.
Want to know something that I personally did a few months ago that proved I was happy? An ex-girlfriend of mine, who I had planned on proposing to and left me abruptly without much of a reason, randomly texted me when she was visiting the town I live in. At first, it confused and frustrated me. Then I accepted it, replied, met up with her and left feeling like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I had my closure and there wasn’t any ill will or thoughts of loneliness nor negativity for her. This forgiveness allowed me to see myself better, rather than have bitterness or jealousy — so it’s no wonder why this character trait is common in happy men.
Being self-aware is a character trait that’s broad, but it’s critical to develop. For instance, being self-aware could be something as simple as slowing down while presenting at work because you know you’re talking too fast. Another instance might be when you make a mistake and, rather than point fingers or make excuses, you own up to it, take whatever punishment is necessary and learn from it to avoid making it again. Once a man truly develops this character trait, he becomes more honest with himself and others, which allows him to put things into perspective in terms of what’s important and what’s not.