Foreplay is one of those things that every guy understands he needs to do, but he doesn’t really understand how much is required to get he and his lady in the mood. For better or worse, most men think they’re either regular Casanova’s who can get a girl wet without much work, or they’re too shy about foreplay because they don’t know what they’re really doing. Fear not, guys, because we’re here to help.
How much foreplay is normal? What type of foreplay is your girl into? Is too much foreplay weird? These are probably all questions we’ve asked ourselves at some point or another during sex. That might seem odd, but, in fact, it’s kind of normal.
For instance, teasing a girl during foreplay will help turn her on, but there comes a time when you’ve got to just give her what she wants — yes, fellas, we’re talking about your dick. If you tease her too much, she may start thinking something’s wrong with you, or that you’re not into her. That’s the last thing you want to have happen.
Since foreplay is necessary before sex, here are some tips to help you not only survive, but thrive during the whole “warming up” period. Hey, we just want you to be at your best.
Foreplay is different for everyone
We’ve said it before, but here’s a little reminder for all you out there; foreplay isn’t always the same for every person. We know, shocking, right?
Here’s the thing, the person you hooked up with last month might really, really enjoy being teased and kissed on the neck and rubbed in certain areas. Problem is, the person who you’re bedding tonight may not be into any of that. In fact, the new partner may not like foreplay at all, other than kissing.
That’s what makes foreplay so difficult at times, because it really requires both people to be onboard with what’s happening and understanding how to take a little control in bed, and ask for something to help turn them on. Hey, sex might be mostly physical, but don’t forget about how crucial communicating is during it either.
Foreplay can come from words, too
Speaking of that whole communicating thing, while there’s a helluva lot of nonverbal communication that occurs in everyday life, when it comes to hooking up and/or sex, don’t hold back on vocalizing how you feel or what you want. That might seem obvious, but there are plenty of times when people hold back once they’re in the sack.
As we mentioned above, some people absolutely can’t stand foreplay, some enjoy it, and some are just really bad at it. But, here’s the thing, it’s important in getting our minds and bodies warmed up prior to having sex, so you and your partner need to find some form of it to get things going.
That’s where speaking can come in, because you and your partner can use your dirty little imaginations to talk about what you want to do to each other. Hell, sometimes sending a naughty text is enough foreplay to get your girl’s sexual energy going, so don’t be afraid to talk dirty to get in the mood if physical foreplay isn’t the preferred method.
Make foreplay fun
Here’s a newsflash: sex should be fun. Yeah, it should be meaningful and safe, too, but, in the end, having sex releases positive endorphins in our brains, which leave us with a feeling of nirvana and happiness. Pretty cool, right?
So when it comes to foreplay, there shouldn’t be a “one size fits all” kind of mentality, because everyone’s different in what they like or prefer. But, when all is said and done, it should be fun.
Some examples of this could be the aforementioned naughty texts to send your girl to get her mind running, or kissing her down the neck and on the collarbone, or, hell, even tickling her can send her to a happy place where she wants to have sex. Whatever works for you and your partner, do that — and have fun!
Is there a certain amount of time that foreplay should last?
Now that we’ve given you some tips on how foreplay should go, how about we answer the biggest question: How long should foreplay last? Since we’ve all wondered this at some point or another, we’re going to use some research to help find the answer.
According to Maxim magazine, with girls absolutely loving foreplay, you need to make sure you’re doing it long enough for her to enjoy it. To hell with sex (for now), because that’ll happen. It’s during foreplay that her mind will really be blown.
With all that said, a YouTube video from the “sexplanations” channel helps us figure out just how long foreplay should really last. From that video, the average foreplay time is about 13 minutes. Thing is, that’s not even enough, with the ideal time being about 18 minutes, per Maxim.
Here’s another thing about good foreplay: it can be the main event.
That’s right, guys, while we all want to have sex, sometimes, just fingering our girl for a good five minutes, or going down on her for 10 minutes, or heavy kissing and rubbing and touching can be enough. So remember that.
What are some good foreplay ideas?
It’s a good thing you asked, because there are plenty of things you and your girl can do to help one another get in the mood, or just get off. Here are some of the top options.
- A sensual massage
- Showering together
- Striptease
- Teasing one another in a public space to get the mind running
- Heavy kissing
- Talking dirty
There are plenty of other foreplay options, but those are some common ones that you might want to try out. Hey, as we said earlier, we just want you to be the best version of yourself, especially in the bedroom, while making sure you take care of your lady’s needs.