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Personality traits go a long way in determining how much success we have in our lives. For instance, those who are more outgoing and take risks often find themselves either in sales jobs or heading up a startup. In contrast, more reserved folks tend to focus on jobs that are independent or don’t require a lot of interaction.

But, more than just in our careers, our personality traits matter when it comes to dating. In fact, they may offer a clear cut reason as to why we end up with the person we do, which is why how you act around others goes a long way in your potential partners.

For those who find themselves either dating the same types of girls or incapable of holding down a relationship, it may actually do more about you than that person, as your personality traits often attract similar people. Likewise, for guys who think certain dudes have all the luck with ladies, well, you might be right, because a new sex study shows that certain personality traits are leading to more action.

That’s according to research from the Queensland (Australia) University of Technology, who interviewed 3,000 men and 1,500 women to come up with one simple conclusion: guys who are more outgoing, emotionally stable and conscientious are getting laid a hell of a lot more frequently. This means that guys who listen to their partners, are friendly and show they care about others are generally getting more action, as these personality traits attract the most girls.

A therapist named Bianca Rodriguez, who spoke with the New York Post about the reason behind this research, said girls “want to feel safe, they want their feelings to be cherished,” which is why the personality traits above are so attractive. Rodriguez went on to add this:

“Women are more discerning than men when it comes to sex,” Rodriguez told the Post, “and they’re looking for qualities in a man that would indicate stability, that they’ll stick around.”

Given this information, it’d be wise to try and get out of your own head and be aware and engaged with others. Of course, that’s not always the easiest option for everyone, so taking baby steps to practice positive mental health could, eventually, lead to some of these personality traits being picked up. That said, being yourself and not faking it for someone else is important, so always remember to do what’s most comfortable for you.

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